Are you REALLY relaxing?

Holiday time is here – and whether we are on holiday or not, a break and relaxation is on the agenda! The question is, when you relax, do you really relax?

With the state of the world, the climate, AI, and numerous other issues to worry about, it can be a bit of a challenge - to put is mildly. But if we’re to ensure we are resilient and can stay active, the body and brain both need to relax and recover – it’s actually not a choice! Yet I need to remind myself as much as anyone else!

Enjoying my balcony in a break from the heatwave the other day, my mind was flitting from one thought to another at the usual lightning speed, mulling over all the tasks I needed to complete before the next heatwave hits, when a small breeze rustled one of my plants, bringing me into the present. It dawned on me that I wasn’t really relaxing.  My shoulders were tense and my jaw was slightly clenched, yet I had come out there specifically to relax, to allow my body to rest and recover from recent busy activities and the debilitating heat. I needed to relax and had no excuse not to, knowing very well how to - never mind knowing the ramifications of not relaxing sufficiently!  I smiled with the realization that I was now judging myself and creating even more tension. Humour helps and I exhaled, finally releasing the tension I had inadvertently held onto.

It is a fact that tension and relaxation cannot co-exist – try tensing your fist and relaxing it simultaneously! Problems arise when we hold onto tension long after the need has passed; for example, have you ever found yourself frowning, clenching your fist or teeth and not even realising you had been doing it?  In addition to letting us know it’s time to let go or relax, this indicates that our body is telling us something important - often something else we are not giving enough attention to.

When we take the time to become aware of our own particular tension points, we can discover what they are telling us and respond accordingly. My clenched jaw tells me I am projecting into the future and not being present. A client tells me her jaw clenches when she is angry, for another it signifies anxiety, and yet another his raised shoulders tells him he is over-caring.

The body is such an awesome information carrier, with it’s own language that can give us huge chunks of knowledge about ourselves and make us increasingly self-aware – which is the first and most essential step whether we are wanting to relax, recover, be fully present, and have much more fun!

If all this resonates with you, we're here to help! For consultations and coaching to address and build all of those brilliant human emotional and stress-management skills, and for more on our programs -current and upcoming- or to contact us regarding talks, mentoring, or facilitation, please email us here.